Wishful thinking?

I was standing in an ice cream store with a friend last week when he started a conversation about wishes. I don't think he was taking the topic as seriously as I was and we got into an argument --for several reasons-- but I'm sure in part because I don't believe in wishes. 

I don't mean you shouldn't hold a great thought in your mind when you blow out your birthday candles, nor is this a matter of feeling that wishes don't come true. Quite to the contrary, I think that wishes often come true, usually through hard work, perseverance, benefaction or luck. But none of those satisfy the passive, instantaneous, genie's snap that wishing connotes.

Many people wish for things that are well within their reach --"I wish I had more money", "I wish I knew how to do speak Swedish", "I wish that girl would talk to me". A second job, less time watching baseball and a trip to the public library, or a simple hello can make all those wishes come true. And if someone makes those sacrifices, those lifestyle changes, or that commitment of will, suddenly, that longed for ideal is not a wish anymore it's a goal. Goals are met (or not) mostly on the diligence of the goal setter. So wishing in that case is superfluous.

Some people wish for things that simply aren't possible. While I do understand the poignant expressions --"I wish Jean was still alive" or "I wish you hadn't done that". Despite the phrasing those are actually expressions of regret. And any other "impossible dream" that a person might wistfully sigh for would (in my book anyway) fall under that vaguely threatening maxim parents like to trot out to "Be careful what you wish for." For example, my friend wished that he could eat as much of anything he wanted all the time and not have to worry about his weight. Well to a certain extent one can. Depending on what you eat, you just have to work out a lot. But let's go the wish route and assume that his metabolism could magically be that way. Can anyone else see this unfolding into a Disney movie with an Aesop's style moral catch? With a metabolism like that wouldn't you be hungry all the time? What if you lost your job because all you could do was eat to keep up with your raging metabolism? Etc. Curious, that I have enough imagination to project the real world flaws in this existence but not enough to bend reality to the ideal.

All that said I do occasionally wish, with heartfelt desire, for impossible things: Almost daily, I am able to slip into my conversation a sincere interest in either the ability or the technology to teleport. I still regret the fact that my brother elected to get married on the same day as my best friend (I wish he hadn't done that). Today was one of those days of an idle, but intended, wish for something currently outside of human existence (at least as I know it).

I wished that I did not have to go home. I don't mean regret over having to visit relatives and such, rather I pictured being able to leave work and instead of getting in a car and driving I would just ascend a staircase formed out of solid air to my cloud-loft apartment that automatically existed in space-time wherever I needed it --most of the time right above work, on the weekends likely over Central Square in Cambridge. I loved this idea until it occurred to me that it sounded a tiny bit like being dead which is not on my wish list at all at the current moment. I suppose the real world version would be to have an endless supply of energy and just go from activity to activity and never have to sleep thus never have to be at home. Crank anyone? And we all saw how pleasant that looked.

I have achieved much of what I desire in this life. The rest I am actively working on. Impossible isn't in my vocabulary but just in case, wish me luck.