Daydream

It's 9:16pm and I'm in bed. Not with someone and not because I'm young enough to have a bedtime.  Because I wasn't feeling so well and I wanted to snuggle down and be quiet and release my day. And dream out loud a bit.

In all my searching for what I do next with my life I have started to see the forest for the trees a little bit. I realized late this week that I spend most of my non-work time  pursuing some physical activity and trying to learn French.  The language being French is less important than how much I enjoy and prioritize that task.  And it started me thinking that I want more of what that feels like in my life. 

So I've been exploring loony ideas lately like diplomacy and peace work and mediation. 

I've discovered that I don't want my job to be my identity, I want my identity to be my job.  I want to do something that is germane to me and get paid to for it.  I enjoy problem solving, relationships and feeling a part of the world community and I love learning languages. I feel like I am old to want to pursue this professional track but...

...but nothing really. I don't know how to move from here to there. Yet. Once upon a time I didn't know how to ride a bike, drive a car, be true to myself. All this was learnable. This next path is as well.

Peace.